Netgalley Partner: Signals

 

As a trained elementary teacher, I was really curious about a book that was going to use the red, yellow, and green traffic light signals for a new behavior system for parents.  Since these colors have become so well known as a behavior management system that does NOT work for many children, especially those from trauma and hard places. 

But to my utter delight, not only has Cherilynn Orr used this long-time behavior management model and color system to redeem that original common classroom strategy.  She has really made it work!  The goal was always to motivate students to improve, learn, and manage their behavior in a classroom, and yet so many kids were failed by the original levels, since once you moved to yellow or red, you identified to the whole room that you were struggling today, and this often was counterproductive and created shame and stress worsening the behavior.  

The model that is taught in this book reflects three levels of a person's brain and regulation.  It also links the truth of God's Word to the science and research on supporting kids from a hard place, and in reality ALL kids in learning to regulate and strengthen their brain functions to reach their pre-frontal cortex and manage their emotions rather than reacting.  The model also expects that the adult embraces new levels of awareness of which mental state the parent is in when interacting with their children.  

Who is the audience for this book:

• someone who wants to be given instructions, a mindset change, and techniques for supporting children.  The author teaches the regulation system to all people including the adults involved.  This tone in the audiobook especially may be misinterpreted by the listener.  
• a believer or follower of Christ who not only wants up-to-date brain research but also follows the Word of God as a way of life and for self-reflection and instruction. 
• A parent, teacher, or adult who is seeking advice for managing the children in their lives who are struggling without the best techniques to seek love, support, and to function more appropriately with others. 
• It is written directly to parents. 
• It is labeled a Christian living book but really functions as a 'self-help' book giving the reader a mindset of ideas, strategies, and questions to consider in how the reader manages and processes their interactions with the children in their lives.  

What I like about the book:

The content shared, the strategies and ideas offered, and the research explained in this book from my many years of learning brain-based best practice strategies to support children are excellent.  As well as the why behind many of the concepts that may be questionable to those new to parenting in this way.  Time Ins, offering a treat and beverage, praising and connecting with the child to re-regulate over tackling the problem or inappropriate behavior immediately, which looks like permissive parenting, but is not when done correctly, as a child needs to connect before he or she can be redirected and learn how to resolve the need, problem, or learn the missing skill.  

• The author is an educator, and the way the book is written in her 'meta cognition' or thinking about her thinking and thinking about what needs the child has that is unmet, by looking at the scenarios as a detective, to identify the why behind the behavior, and a plan to help change the concern immediately and move to a level of thinking where the child can learn a better way.
• Strategies, techniques, and methods to support regulation are fully integrated across the book.    
• Images, cartoons, and visuals to support the concepts which make interpretation of the teaching clearer and the tone clear, the goal is just to help the reader grasp what this strategy looks like, sounds like, and how it relates to God's design for humanity and clarifies the tone from advice to content.  
• The focus on how much managing and modeling our children's regulation rests on the adult remaining functional, aware that the child is not intentionally creating problems, but that they have unmet needs, unsolved problems, or a lack of skills.  
• Recognition that fatigue, hydration, nutrition, hunger, activity, etc all make the above regulation struggles amplified.  
• Stoplight Connections: Questions and tasks to complete as you read, that are educationally valuable in applying the concepts to your thinking.  
• Prayer: ends each chapter and gives a true glimpse of the author's recognition that parenting is hard, often a struggle, and shows our humanness and flaws regularly keeping us dependent on the support of the Holy Spirit molding us. 

What I wonder about the book:

• Would the audiobook version have seemed less cheesy or more authentic if read by the author herself? I'm not sure.  
• How many diverse learners may miss the quality instruction, content, and thinking that is so well done in this book because they are triggered by the tone, style, or their misperception of the style of writing?
• If the unique aspects of biblical integration will be appreciated by readers or will create another trigger or struggle in hearing the much-needed message.    

Thankful to partner with Netgalley and Thomas Nelson to read an e-copy of the newly released book, and thankful for Hoopla to have the opportunity to also listen to parts of the book as I wanted to continue to think and process the book before completing my review.