Once you determine your children will be with you in the main meeting of your local church, you have to think about what to do, to make it the celebration and joyous time that you want it to be. And with children, that means thinking about what will help their attitudes be at their best and give it a chance.
Here are some things that I have done, note some strategies are not good parenting strategies, but there are times, we choose what will work in the short term, over total heart change. But my strategies were around the kids basic needs, as well as the attempt to keep them learning, attentive, focused, and with a pleasant demeanor, not just children who are seen and not heard. These techniques help them want to be at church, and learn to listen.
Food/Water
1) Currently two of my children bring a bottle of Pop (Soda) to church with them. We are in a body of believers that goes out of their way to have fun warm beverages for adults (teens, tweens, etc) and these are allowed in the auditorium. So spills are normal. It's a treat my kids enjoy and it helps set the mood that this is special.
2) When the kids were little, we often brought snacks into the meeting, sometimes even breakfast, depending on their eating routine. Sometimes we allowed them during the meeting, other times, we encouraged snack time to be during the break. We also brought water for each of us.
3) When we had special Sundays where the kids attended both meetings with the adults, and my husband was out of town, I one time handed out candy (the tiny square size or a two m and ms) if I looked around the row and the four children (ages 6, 7, 10, and 14) were sitting nicely and seemed focused, they got a piece- now it was an hour long meeting- so they maybe got 4 or 5 candies. But I remember how well they sat, how attentive they were, and now good natured they were when the meeting ended. We were the only happy, calm bunch in our section that day. It was worth it. Have I ever done it again. Nope. But sometimes it's what works not what's best.
Focus/Engagement/Movement
Depending on your child's age, learning style, personality, and needs, some kids can sit quietly and attentively with nothing in their hands, no coloring, no bible, etc. Other children need something to keep their hands occupied, and most children need something to mentally engage them. Here are some ways we've done this.
4) Our church provides themed packets or coloring/activity pages for kids to complete and this is really helpful when they can listen to the songs and find a correlating picture and cross off as we sing, I don't get how much longer, or are we done yet. One neat technique I've recently found is to give non reading kids 4-6 words, tell them what they are, and have them tally how many times they hear them during the meeting. All of this helps them focus. (I actually create the themed packets so I'll do a future post of ideas and ways to engage our kids.)
5) When our children were between ages 2-5 or 6 (the non reading stage) we allowed toys that were special to church to come, that didn't make noise, and could last a long time- traditionally STEM type toys- Wendy's restaurant gave out, and you could build with, and they didn't take up much space.
6) Fidgets, we still allow at ages up to 13, but I'd allow my 17 a fidget if he needed it, as long as they are quiet. There are several versions of wood cubes with elastic stringing it together, these are quiet and even I like to fidget with them. We also like Tangle It Jr., any bendy figures, my daughter puts a hair rubber-band on her wrist and fidgets with that, as well as Wooly Willy tiny size (they come from birthday party favors). I also carry small colored pencils, a small notebook, and a word find, as I have older kids. The picture to the right is what I have in my bible purse now. I change it a few times a year. We often share with kids around us. And you should know gum provides deep sensory input so it helps kids sit better.
7) We also love biblical coloring books as well. The picture is from a 5 by 7 book that I currently have in my bible purse. I use gel pens to color it, and I color in the car too on long trips. My kids color at church, I normally take notes at church.
This is just a start of some ideas we've used. I'll keep adding as I post about Worship with children. I have tips on what our children have read and brought as readers to Big Church, as well as the types of activities that we have done before a meeting, or if they are so wound, they need to be taken out of a meeting, to get all the wiggles out and sit better. Of course, I am the mom that with our child in kinship care, let him at age 6 or 7 sit upside down with his feet in the air for a meeting, while I held one leg, and our college student friend, who this child adored, held the other. Months later, he retold the whole sermon to someone who was using it as an illustration and thought Paul and the snake and at sea might be too obscure for him to know about. Kids can listen and move, color, etc. Not all kids, but many will do better with these tools.
Here are some things that I have done, note some strategies are not good parenting strategies, but there are times, we choose what will work in the short term, over total heart change. But my strategies were around the kids basic needs, as well as the attempt to keep them learning, attentive, focused, and with a pleasant demeanor, not just children who are seen and not heard. These techniques help them want to be at church, and learn to listen.
Food/Water
1) Currently two of my children bring a bottle of Pop (Soda) to church with them. We are in a body of believers that goes out of their way to have fun warm beverages for adults (teens, tweens, etc) and these are allowed in the auditorium. So spills are normal. It's a treat my kids enjoy and it helps set the mood that this is special.
2) When the kids were little, we often brought snacks into the meeting, sometimes even breakfast, depending on their eating routine. Sometimes we allowed them during the meeting, other times, we encouraged snack time to be during the break. We also brought water for each of us.
3) When we had special Sundays where the kids attended both meetings with the adults, and my husband was out of town, I one time handed out candy (the tiny square size or a two m and ms) if I looked around the row and the four children (ages 6, 7, 10, and 14) were sitting nicely and seemed focused, they got a piece- now it was an hour long meeting- so they maybe got 4 or 5 candies. But I remember how well they sat, how attentive they were, and now good natured they were when the meeting ended. We were the only happy, calm bunch in our section that day. It was worth it. Have I ever done it again. Nope. But sometimes it's what works not what's best.
Focus/Engagement/Movement
Depending on your child's age, learning style, personality, and needs, some kids can sit quietly and attentively with nothing in their hands, no coloring, no bible, etc. Other children need something to keep their hands occupied, and most children need something to mentally engage them. Here are some ways we've done this.
5) When our children were between ages 2-5 or 6 (the non reading stage) we allowed toys that were special to church to come, that didn't make noise, and could last a long time- traditionally STEM type toys- Wendy's restaurant gave out, and you could build with, and they didn't take up much space.
6) Fidgets, we still allow at ages up to 13, but I'd allow my 17 a fidget if he needed it, as long as they are quiet. There are several versions of wood cubes with elastic stringing it together, these are quiet and even I like to fidget with them. We also like Tangle It Jr., any bendy figures, my daughter puts a hair rubber-band on her wrist and fidgets with that, as well as Wooly Willy tiny size (they come from birthday party favors). I also carry small colored pencils, a small notebook, and a word find, as I have older kids. The picture to the right is what I have in my bible purse now. I change it a few times a year. We often share with kids around us. And you should know gum provides deep sensory input so it helps kids sit better. 
7) We also love biblical coloring books as well. The picture is from a 5 by 7 book that I currently have in my bible purse. I use gel pens to color it, and I color in the car too on long trips. My kids color at church, I normally take notes at church. This is just a start of some ideas we've used. I'll keep adding as I post about Worship with children. I have tips on what our children have read and brought as readers to Big Church, as well as the types of activities that we have done before a meeting, or if they are so wound, they need to be taken out of a meeting, to get all the wiggles out and sit better. Of course, I am the mom that with our child in kinship care, let him at age 6 or 7 sit upside down with his feet in the air for a meeting, while I held one leg, and our college student friend, who this child adored, held the other. Months later, he retold the whole sermon to someone who was using it as an illustration and thought Paul and the snake and at sea might be too obscure for him to know about. Kids can listen and move, color, etc. Not all kids, but many will do better with these tools.
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