Book Review: Talking Back to The Purity Culture by Rachel Joy Welcher

 

 Look I bought this book!

I appreciate Rachel Joy Welcher’s desire to be sure that the church has open conversations about these important truths, makes clear decisions about teaching Gods Word over the cultures interpretation of the Bible.  She does a great job setting the stage, raising the issues, and informing the readers of concerns, cautions, and she ends the book with her prayerfully approached response to this culture, and shares the concepts and scripture to approach educating the next generation from a biblical worldview.  

I think this book is a great jumping point for conversations, as a parent of teens, I appreciated the last few chapters that focused on ways to address sexuality and Gods design that might prevent some of the misunderstandings of the rules based expectations.  Read the book.  The last few chapters were my favorites.

I love the discussion questions and activity that every chapter ends with.  I love the research and interviews the book is built on, and the foundation of scripture integrated throughout the book.  

I wonder if her directness, the bold aspects of sexual relationships, experiences, and stories will be too much for some readers, it certainly may make many blush, even more uncomfortable, but while it’s a sensitive topic, she’s approached it well, with her experience and others well represented, and she doesn’t fully give the list of clear do’s and don’ts that some may hope for in a book on the purity culture.  

To help a review reader gain my perspective.  I’m 48, married almost 26 years.  I have two teens, ages 15 and 18, and an almost 11 year old.  My place and story in the early end of this culture is shared below.  

I was a teen in the start of this cultural movement, with the True Love Waits events.  I was a newlywed and youth leader when the culture expanded to I Kissed Dating Goodbye and I read the book so I could connect, I was an education college faculty member in the era of purity rings, contracts, even bigger cultural impacts than my era. That said, I married my high school sweetheart, after college, and we attended different colleges only seeing one another at holidays, and rare prepaid card calls.  We didn’t date the whole way through, giving us space to find our identities outside our relationship, and outside our parents homes.  But we waited until we were married to follow Gods design and plan, but we held hands, hugged, kissed, and hotly debated often keeping our physical connection appropriate and honoring to one another and God. 

So in many ways I experienced this culture, had great friends, leaders, mentors, and family where we had conversations about Gods design for relationships and his design for sexual intimacy.  I’m thankful that my training was focused on the Word of God and making my life’s decisions around His truth.  And I challenged those single young people who discussed this with me, not to focus on the rules or pledges, but to focus on following and honoring God by their choices.  Sin is sin plain and clear.  Lying is a sin, having sex before marriage is a sin, in Gods eyes all sin separates us from God. It’s only by His grace, His plan, and the saving work of Jesus dying, rising again, and giving us the Holy Spirit that we can have a relationship with God and bring Him glory by living for Him.